Rules Regarding: Elevators

We here at the Fourth Corner are increasingly troubled by a lack of etiquette in America, or at least its beloved capital, Washington. People honk absently, raise the middle finger with no reason, spit, and don't shower before boarding the red line. So, to improve our lives, and the lives of those around us, the Fourth Corner introduces "Rules Regarding." This week we'll be covering elevator etiquette. Feel free to add anything I've missed.

1. As in the restroom, conversations in elevators should be kept to a minimum.
2. If you are only going up one floor, take the stairs.
   
3. Shower.
4. If you look at a crowded elevator and think, "I can fit in there," wait for the next lift.
5. People are only talking to you about the weather because you started talking about the weather.
   
6. If you have children, make them take the stairs.
   
7. If you breathe through your mouth, hold your breath, or take the stairs.
8. Stare at the numbers going up. This is where your eyes should be.
   
9. When others are in the elevator, do not hold the door open to finish a conversation with someone.
   
10. As in the restroom, when entering a spacious elevator do not stand right next to the other guy. Space out.